


One Ring to Bind Them: A Halachic Inquiry on the Occasion of Purim 5775

by Rymenhild



Category: Jewish Legend & Lore, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Gen, i am not a rabbi, purim torah, this is not halachic advice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-04
Updated: 2015-03-04
Packaged: 2018-03-16 06:40:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3478202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rymenhild/pseuds/Rymenhild
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rabbi, is it possible to use the One Ring, to rule them all, in the ceremony of <i>kiddushin</i> to solemnize a marriage?</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Ring to Bind Them: A Halachic Inquiry on the Occasion of Purim 5775

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lanna Michaels (lannamichaels)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lannamichaels/gifts).



> Many crucial legal points in this _teshuvah_ were supplied by [batyatoon](http://archiveofourown.org/users/batyatoon/pseuds/batyatoon). I am not a rabbi, and neither is batyatoon. Please bring any questions on the legitimacy of marriage to your own _mara d'atra_. If you have the option of using the [One Ring](http://www.jenshansen.com/collections/lord-of-the-rings-wedding-ring) as your wedding band, I can only say, "Don't."
> 
> See endnotes for a glossary.

Q: Rabbi, is it possible to use the One Ring, to rule them all, in the ceremony of _kiddushin_ to solemnize a marriage?

A: A good question, my child. The One Ring, which is said to have great powers in binding its wearer in the darkness (of a wedding bed?), might seem to be an excellent choice to bind two people together in marriage. We will consider the legal ramifications of this choice.

As you know, there are many rules and traditions on the matter of what gift a _chosson_ may give to his _kallah_ during the wedding ceremony, in order to acquire her as his bride. First, it must be worth at least a _perutah_ ; that is, a coin sufficient to purchase the smallest item that may be purchased alone. In one known case, a wedding ceremony was [invalidated](https://books.google.com/books?id=vmnyWXOZZvgC&pg=PA114&lpg=PA114&dq=perutah&source=bl&ots=pyAK1rIQGc&sig=jb4AvcwdStLFdNFlEi3yxVJrtbo&hl=en&sa=X&ei=clP2VKnPO4GdgwTKhIDQAQ&ved=0CDYQ6AEwAw#v=onepage&q=perutah&f=false) due to the supposed groom giving a bottle cap to his purported bride, when a bottle cap is not, in fact, worth a _perutah._

It would seem that the One Ring is indeed worth more than a _perutah_ , as it is of such great value that lords of Men and Orcs all over Middle-Earth consider it priceless. It is made all of gold, as is our tradition for wedding rings. We do not use gems in wedding rings, as the gems could conceivably be false, and then the value of the betrothal would be unknown. Thus we learn that it is not permissible to marry using the Three Rings of the Elves, the Seven Rings of the Dwarves, or the Nine Rings given to Men, all of which include stones. 

However, the reason we give wedding rings made only of pure metal is that these rings may be melted down, and the value of the gold weighed. It is known that when the One Ring is tossed into a fire, it does not melt; instead it reveals words of flame. The One Ring may not be true gold according to _halacha_ , and therefore its value may not be tested. Furthermore, at no point in the Third Age has the One Ring been sold for purchase; we do not know what value in coin could buy it. The One Ring may not in fact be worth a _perutah._

There are, of course, other requirements for a true marriage. The gift must also be delivered with intent to marry; that is, the _chosson_ must utter the words _Harei at m'kudeshet li k'daat Gandalf v'Eretz haTichonah_ , "You are sanctified to me according to the laws of Gandalf and Middle-Earth," at the time he delivers the gift. In general, the person giving the One Ring to another party tends not to remember to utter these words; he is more likely to say, "My precious! You've stolen my precious!" From this we learn that Bilbo Baggins is not actually married to Gollum, despite the passing of the Ring, nor has Bilbo Baggins wedded Frodo Baggins. A _chosson_ with the strength of will to remember the _kiddushin_ formula at the moment he surrenders the One Ring would be a fine husband indeed. 

There is the small dilemma that the One Ring twists all vows sworn upon it to evil. There is also the further dilemma that one would hardly want to have a wedding ring that renders the wearer invisible. _Tsnius_ is a great virtue, of course, but this is ridiculous.

For all of these reasons, this _teshuvah_ rules that it is not permissible to use the One Ring in _kiddushin_. Try something a little less cursed, like the Ring of the Nibelung.

**Author's Note:**

> Glossary:
> 
>  _chosson_ : a groom  
>  _halacha_ : Jewish law  
>  _halachic_ : the adjectival form of halacha; referring to Jewish law  
>  _kallah_ : a bride  
>  _kiddushin_ : the formal marriage ceremony, in which (traditionally) a groom acquires sole sexual rights to his bride in return for a gift (often a ring) worth at least a perutah  
>  _mara d'atra_ : the rabbi who acts as one's personal authority on Jewish law  
>  _perutah_ : a unit of money, considered to be worth the smallest amount of money that can purchase an individual object  
>  _teshuvah_ : (in this context; there are other meanings) a rabbi's response to a halachic question  
>  _tsnius_ : modesty


End file.
